Why can’t I touch you?
by goodbye2you
Summary: I can never be with you. They won't allowed but I can't take my mind off you no matter how hard I try no matter what I do. Sorry I don't usually write romance and am trying out a new pairing. Rated: T for cutting, nothing really happens otherwise.


**Why can't I touch you?**

**I just wanted to try this pairing to see if it always had to suck. Sorry I don't usually write romance so I might be a bit bad but hey I tried. I'm telling you who the pairing is until the end of the chapter. It's not a gay pairing even if it sounds like it, lots of people write fics about this but they are usually jokes or little kids. **

**Rated T for someone cutting themselves not the usual reason behind romance fics.**

I love you like no one else I'll ever have. I've kept it bottled up for so long, thinking it was wrong and I'll grow out of it. I never told anyone just hoping it'll go away but the opposite happened it grew and grew until I felt my heart would burst if I didn't let my love free. I knew I couldn't tell anyone still so I focused on battling only; I covered my feelings up with that obsession of making the league.

I could hold you only sometimes but act like it's out of just happiness. I felt those moment held on for hours before having to let go reluctantly. So many nights I had fallen asleep crying so many times thinking about you.

How could someone be so close yet you cannot touch them, cannot hold them, cannot kiss them whisper you're the one. Why could we not been the same so people would glare and spit at us. Why is it as I sit all I can think of is you. People wouldn't think of you as beautiful as I do, sure they might say you're a bit cute but never beautiful. Why can't people see that we are meant to be.

No, no, no this really is wrong, it can't be. It won't work at all it will never work it must just be a long phase like the Goth phase Gary went through, I had never seen so much eyeliner on a person, scary! I will just sit here until I grow out of it and that's final.

Who am I kidding that won't work. I'll never stop loving you, you're just so perfect. No! Stop it; get a hold of yourself man. I have to try harder put my will into it. It might happen, maybe.

I love you so much but it's more than different families, it's more trouble than Romeo and Juliet ever went through. It's worse than dating May, at the first sign of Drew I was pushed into the nearest bush and they made kissy faces. If I hadn't just dated her to take my mind of you I probably would have been put off women for ever. Still I haven't had a good run with love as you can see.

Yet the training doesn't work I still feel you close to me holding my heart. I never met a girl who liked battling like you. You are the best at it. Stop thinking about that! Another thought another cut. My arms are sliced up pretty bad because I can't get you out of my head.

Fresh blood dripped off my arm mixing with my tears. Why can't life be easy, if you look at my life it looks easy, like it looks like I'm happy. Why can't I scream to the world I love you? I still can't even though we are perfect together. I know you would never cry like me you are strong when I am weak. You would never resort to cutting yourself. I can never get anything right.

"You're up late buddy," a familiar voice smiled.

It's you, I love your voice I love so much. It seemed to rise my sprits instantly. No! I bit down hard on my lip and allowed the blood to flow freely. I tried to dodge your gaze and quickly hid my arm. You were always know for you speed and grabbed it. "Ash, did you do this," you asked concerned.

Tears flowed freely from my eyes. "Buddy, what is this about?" you asked with a stern tone edged with concern.

I kept silent, I had held them this long. I could hold them for a while longer. You tried again, I know you too well to know you would give up that easily. "Is it about May?" you asked rubbing my shoulder.

I knew if I didn't give you an answer you would stop but my mouth wouldn't work so I shook my head. You pause for a minute before you asked, "Is this about me?"

My heart said yes, my brain said no and my mouth made a kind of strangled noise. I turned my head to you. Your smile had disappeared and your face seemed so different. Your eyes brimmed with tears. I still didn't make a noise. You didn't run or look at me with the disgust I thought. You moved closer placing your hand on my arm, I winced as you ran your hand over my cuts. I knife plunged into my heart as you utter one word, "Why?".

I looked at the ground tear turning the ground to mud. My heart seem to die at that moment, my shoulders slumped and the world couldn't seem worse. "You know I never said no. I just asked why?" you whispered.

I instantly perked up. The words that had tortured my soul poured out you never interrupted me, you never showed disgust but understanding. "How long have you loved me Ash?" you asked.

I answered quietly, "Ever since I ever met you".

You gave one of your laughs not a hurting one but one which raises sprits, swirls around people and lifts them up and makes then invicible. "Remember the first time we met. I nearly killed you. You know why," she smiled.

I shook my head. "Because I liked you. I thought it was strange and unholy. So I hid it through hurting you but I could stay like that for long. I started to like you and trust you. I could stand to hurt you anymore. I let you lead me," she laughed.

I couldn't believe this. Today started one of the worst days of my life ending up with my one true love admitting she loved me as much as I did her. For minutes we just smiled at each other grinning like idiots. "So what are we going to tell them?" you asked worriedly, "You know they won't accept this".

"I know".

"So what are we going to tell them buddy".

I paused before answering, "Everything. I don't care what they think anymore, that only caused pain. I am going to do what I should of done ages ago. I'm going to yell; I Ash Ketchum love you Pikachu and I will always will".

And I wasn't lying.

**I know I know stupid pairing but it was an experiment to see if this pair always had to be stupid and ill written.**


End file.
